maven - exec-maven-plugin starts not in the right phase

Question

I want to start a server in pre-integration-phase and do some integration tests. Problem is that it only starts after the integration tests.

My pom looks like this:

plugin>
            <artifactId>maven-failsafe-plugin</artifactId>
            <version>2.14.1</version>
            <executions>
                <execution>
                    <goals>
                        <goal>integration-test</goal>
                        <goal>verify</goal>
                    </goals>
                </execution>
            </executions>
        </plugin>
        <plugin>
            <groupId>org.codehaus.mojo</groupId>
            <artifactId>exec-maven-plugin</artifactId>
            <version>1.2.1</version>
            <executions>
                <execution>
                    <id>start-server</id>
                    <phase>pre-integration-test</phase>
                    <goals>
                        <goal>java</goal>
                    </goals>
                    <configuration>
                        <executableDependency>
                            <groupId>mygroup</groupId>
                            <artifactId>MyServer-Server</artifactId>
                        </executableDependency>
                        <mainClass>mygroup.myServer.MyServer</mainClass>
                        <arguments>
                            <argument>-batch</argument>
                            <argument>-port</argument>
                            <argument>1024</argument>
                        </arguments>
                    </configuration>
                </execution>
            </executions>
        </plugin>

and my Test is a jUnit-Case named TestMyServerIT located in src/test/main looks like this:

public class TestMyServerIT {

private Socket server;

@Test
public void testConnection() {
    try {
        server = new Socket("localhost", 1024);
    } catch (IOException e) {
        e.printStackTrace();
    }
}

}

which fails with a connection denied if try mvn verify.
But it succeeds when I have a server running.

If I comment the test out, there is a server running on port 1024 after "mvn verify" since I don't stop it yet in the pom file. And I can access it on this port just fine, just not in time for the tests.

How can I assert the server is started before my tests?

It seems I have another problem I need to solve first. Failsafe-plugin is not starting on verify and says it is missing its xml if I try failsafe:verify